THE GIFT OF HELPLESSNESS

"Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest."
Matthew 11:28

"As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in me. 5I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing." John 15:4-5

How do you feel about helplessness? I have nothing but mercy and compassion towards those who are helpless. Babies are good at being helpless. Little children are good at helplessness. Feeble, ill, weak, and crippled people are good at being helpless. I have ministered to many who are in places in their lives that they are hopeless, hapless, and helpless.

When it comes to me, helplessness is a different story altogether. I have developed as an adult an aversion to helplessness. I do not like being helpless at all. All of my life I have worked to maintain at least an illusion to myself and others that I am not helpless. By nature I have been a high achiever, a self sufficient loner, very self disciplined, highly ambitious, in control, a planner, a success driven striver. I always made sure my ducks were lined up and that I had alternatives to my alternatives to fix and solve any problem that I had. It has taken me thirty seven years of being a Christian to learn that before God I am truly helpless.

I had ministry, a comfortable income, a 35 year marriage, and my life seemed in total control, just the way I like it. Then a year ago my life crashed. It went from order to chaos,; predictable to unpredictable, comfortable to uncomfortable, in control to out of control, safe and secure to totally insecure. AND I HATED IT!!!!

I tried everything to fix it, get it back in order, line up my ducks in a row, get everything back to the way it used to be, the way that I wanted it and nothing worked. I was utterly humbled by the realization that I cannot fix my life to be the way I wanted it. I realized the illusion of my self sufficiency and ability to control my life. Suddenly i had no wife to depend on, few friends to lean on, no job, no open doors, no ministry, my health was failing, the phone was not ringing, my ability to solve problems was failing, my tools and skills were inadequate, and I was in big trouble.

I was empty-handed, weary, scared, lonely, utterly broken, and heavy-laden. For the first time in my life, I was so desperate, so broken, so tired, so weak, so scared, so inadequate, and so helpless that all I could do is throw myself in desperation on His mercy and cry "help me", "save me", "deliver me"

I became motivated to come to God because of the reality and the deep conviction that I am completely helpless to do my life on my own. I have learned that these are the very cries that bring us into the deepest communion and bring God the greatest glory.

The 17th century Scottish pastor Samuel Rutherford was imprisoned by the Anglicans for non-conformity. In prison he made a great discovery that he expresses in these words.

If God had told me some time ago that He was about to make me as happy as I can be in this world, and then He told me that He should begin by crippling me in all my limbs, and removing me from all of my usual sources of enjoyment. I should have thought it a very strange mode of accomplishing His purpose. And yet, how is His wisdom manifest even in this! For if you should see a man shut up in a closed room, idolizing a set of lamps and rejoicing in their light, and you wished to make him truly happy, you would begin by blowing out all of his lamps; and then throw open the shutters to let in the light of heaven."

When I suffered the loss of virtually everything that mattered and faced a dark, uncertain future, I found myself praying for God to give me back my life over and over again. When God began to blow out my lamps, I began asking God to give me my lamps back. When He didn't, I found myself angry, depressed,terrified, anxious, despairing, and inconsolably sorrowful about the wind that had blown out my lamps. But now I have began to see what God was doing, blowing out my lamps in order to throw open the shutters and let in the light of heaven!

Throughout the gospels we see people coming to Jesus because they are helpless like me. I have been teaching in John where we see it over and over again. The Samaritan woman had no water (John 4). Later in that same chapter, the officials son has no health. The crippled man at the pool of Bethesda has no help to get into the water (John 5). the crowd has no bread (John 6). The blind man has no sight (John 9). Lazarus has no life (John 11).

When we received Jesus, we apparently felt we were helpless. Many of us forget that is how we follow Him. Paul wrote in Colossians 2:6, "Therefore, as you received Christ Jesus the Lord, so walk in him". Really feeling, thinking, and believing in our helplessness is fundamental to living the Christian life.

For Paul, helplessness was his badge of apostleship and authority from God. Listen to his words:

"So to keep me from becoming conceited because of the surpassing greatness of the revelations, a thorn was given me in the flesh, a messenger of Satan to harass me, to keep me from becoming conceited. Three times I pleaded with the Lord about this, that it should leave me. But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong. " (2 Corinthians 12:7-10 ESV)

Paul argues for the authenticity of his ministry by appealing, not to his visions and revelations nor to his successes and gifts, but instead to his weakness! He attributed all of his ministry to his helplessness, brokenness, neediness, and weakness. That is the ground by which the power and glory of Jesus flowed through him. It was in that lowly place of utter dependency that God moved in his life.

Helplessness is the design and will of God for our lives. The Psalmist writes that "The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit;a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise" (Psalm 51:17 ESV). God finds pleasure in us when we are in the place of brokenness, humility, poverty of spirit, and neediness.

These places of brokenness and weakness are not desired in this world. Nobody wants to be known as weak, needy, poor, or inadequate. Paul sure didn't! He asked the Lord repeatedly to take away whatever it was that handicapped him.He did not want to have to live and serve God in this lowly state. The Lord, refused."Three times I pleaded with the Lord about this, that it should leave me. But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong."

Paul came to see that this helplessness, this weakness, this brokenness, this neediness was indeed a precious gift from God. This was the place that released the true flow of God's power, strength, and grace in his life and ministry and it will be the same for you. God knows where His power and glory thrive and where it is diminished.

Paul's growth as a Christian is remarkable in that his growth increased as his own sense of his helplessness, weakness, and sinfulness increased. In 1 Corinthians 15:9, Paul calls himself "the least of the apostles." Five years later, in Ephesians 3:8 he calls himself "the least of all God's people." Finally, two years before his he calls himself after walking with Jesus for thirty years, "The worst of all sinners" in 1 Timothy 1:15. For Paul, the way up in God's kingdom was down! The less he saw of Himself, the more he saw of Christ. The greater awareness of his helplessness, brokenness, and sinfulness before God, the more he was amazed by God's gift of grace towards someone like him. He received help by being helpless. He became stronger by becoming weaker. He became rich by becoming poor. He became successful by becoming a failure. Oh dear reader, do not despise those gifts.

The gospel uses your helplessness as the doorway to God's grace. When you agree with Jesus that "apart from me you can do nothing" (John 15:5), you are maturing as a Christian. I now see that the security of a marriage, a ministry, a job, relationships, approval of man, and health from which I have fallen from was really a trusting in my strength and ability and plans and people. Today all I can do is trust Jesus and no one and nothing else.

So now I pray all day, every day. I cry out to my Father in heaven in my helplessness, "help me", "heal me", "save me", "guide me", "fill me ", "teach me", "show me", "enable me", "strengthen me", "fill me", "deliver me", "forgive me", and numerous more simple helpless cries.
Jesus is not asking you and me to do anything that He is not already doing. He is inviting us into His life of helpless dependence upon our heavenly Father. To become more like Jesus is to feel more and more that you cannot do life. The very thing we often times try to escape, our own helplessness, becomes the launch pad to prayer and then to God's help and grace.

Helpless and being helped,
Pastor Bill